Protect Against Child Predators
We parents are at war with drug dealers, bullies, peer pressure, pedophiles and other dangers to our children. To plan our strategy, we need to know the enemy.
Pedophiles are able to manipulate, control and dominate children, and evade detection, because of their skill at controlling children's natural instincts.
One technique to keep a child from telling is to befriend, bribe the child to cooperate and allow her to do something the parent said was not allowed. Then they keep the child quiet by threatening to tell on her.
Another tactic is threat of violence against the child or loved ones. Another is praise and reward followed by withdrawal of love when the child refuses to comply, leaving the child confused and vulnerable.
You cannot identify a pedophile by appearance. He does not hide in the park wearing a trench coat! He is middle to upper class, involved with children as a group activities leader or teacher. Or he may be a childless uncle who buys gifts and takes children on outings. Like all predators, they go after the weaker willed.
We teach our children to beware of strangers offering candy, but force them to go to Uncle John's or Aunt Jill's in spite of their reluctance and fear of the person. Rather than finding out why, we assume they dislike the adult because he or she is too strict.. We scold them for tattling on siblings without telling them when it is ok to tattle.We force them to participate in sports to build character.
We are so busy that we do not take the time to listen to our little ones. It is easier to ignore their fears and reluctance.
Preventing abuse requires communication. Children have a right and need to tell us when someone frightens, hurts or threatens them. They are entitled to our attention.
Starting when they are young, let them know secrets are wrong. Listen when they say they are afraid of a person, activity or place. Teach them which body parts should not be touched. When picking them up from gatherings, arrive earlier than expected. Read lists of sex offenders in your area. Pay attention to photos because people change names. If you recognize a neighbor, check his offense. If it was child abuse, do not allow him access to your child!
If your child is afraid of a teacher, talk to the teacher's superintendent. If he is a group leader, report your concerns to the person in charge. If you are right, there are probably other children in danger. However, be careful to avoid false accusations. When in doubt, have your child talk to a councilor.
Predators require secrecy, so teach your children not to keep bad secrets. Let them know they can tell you and you will protect them and their loved ones.
Be informed, aware and prepared to take action when needed!
